My husband addicted to drugs but PASSED drug test! How can this be??? BIG MESS! HELP!!!?
I am going through some VERY hard times right now. I have been married for 15 years to this man & since the past 4 years he started using & abusing drugs. (Lortabs, oxycontin, oxycodone, percecets, morphene suckers and marijuana & whetever else he could get his hands on. LONG story short, his abuse has destroyed our family. I have 2 children, one is 19 yrs old from former relationship, (I got married to him when she was only 3yrs). We also have a daughter together who is now 3 years old.
He had gotten so out of control he threatened to hit my 19 yr old & I stepped in between to protect her & he threatened to knock us both in the floor, but didn’t. I ended up leaving with my 2 girls hoping things would calm down in a day or two. I called him to try to see what frame of mind he was in to see if it was safe to return home, he only sounded as MAD as ever!!! He says it’s because I took our 3 yr old girl. (I didn’t want to, but I felt I had to for everyone’s safety). Well, he actually made threats against me & my 19 yr olds life on about 4 different phone calls…..(he didn’t come right out & say he would "kill us", but it certainly was implied! Such as saying things like …"I will use all my money, power & resorces to get you & Joshualyn (my 19 yr old daughter) out of the way!!!" because he said that "NO ONE will ever keep him away from his daughter!" (our 3 yr old). another time he said "because I have done this unpardonable sin (of taking our 3 yr old away) that I am driving my own nails in my coffin!" The man isn’t even in his right mind anymore! anyway, that was just a couple phone conversations with him. Well of course I have a protection order now & I filed for a divorce about 2 weeks ago. (this all happened about 1 month ago now). Ok, now we have our lawyers & I demand hair follical drug testing because I KNOW with my own eyes for a FACT he did drugs! But lo & behold HIS HAIR & URINE test came back CLEAN!!!! How can this be??? Does anyone know HOW someone can pass a test like that when you are indeed doing drugs? Oh yes, I need to say that this past June (after years of pleading) he did go to a detox place, which he did just now complete, BUT he was Still smoking pot up till the day I left 1 month ago. & was also abusing the narcotic "Subutex" they gave him to get off ALL the other junk! SO why didn’t ANYTHING show up???? Please help, I don’t know how he could have done this! ???
This guy sounds like a clever addict, which is unfortunate for you. Okay cannibis stays in a persons system 30 days and can’t be detected past 30 days. Also in High Times magazine, they show products to flush out the various drugs and the counter product can be ordered through those magazines. He can also get information off the internet from addict science freaks.. As for Subutex, all he had to do was mention that it would be found in his system and have a doctor back his report of subutex as his treatment for narcotics, since Subutex is in itself an opiate derivative it will show but the experts will discount the opiate detection because he is being treated with it and unless one asks for drug speicific testing, he can do any opiate under that cover..
So your lawyer needs to ask for a quantitative (which could prove abuse of his treatment drug Subutex) and a specific drug testing including other narcotics such as you said he uses.
Results take longer and the test may be more expensive. Another thing you may want to do is go to an addictionologist who is someone who is usually a doctor who specializes in drug abuse. Tell him your situation and ask him if he or she can give you information on it. Then later if needed subpoena him to testify in court. Don’t say that is your long range plan. Chemical Dependency people are not thrilled to testify.
You did the right thing and life can get better for you.
Go to the police with the fact he is threatening you. If possible record his off shoot threats and ask "What do you mean by that?" Hopefully he will say kill you or something specific. But even if he doesn’t the detectives will recognize he is threatening you even if it isn’t strong enough for conviction, it is strong enough for an empathetic cop to take a special interest in your case.Addict is viloating the protection order by contacting you. He can be picked up for it. Your daughter needs to get proactive with you and file her own complaints and protection order. Try to speak with a detective and not just a uniform cop.
My prayers are with you. E MAIL me. I care and I will be a part of your support team if you wish. I mean I am available to talk with you. I don’t know where you live. I am in WA state.
October 18th, 2009 at 12:21 pm
Junkies can trick drug tests because that is all they think about aside from getting drugs. Look, he’s a loser user and his drug abuse will eventaully come out in the wash. His act will fade and he will be exposed a true junkie.
You need to stay the path and stay away from this dude. Be sure to be in a safe location and be sure the police know if he ever comes to your home. Keep down this path that is taking you away from this bad man.
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October 18th, 2009 at 1:01 pm
i’m surprised that a hair test was clean
maybe he has fake hair. he got a sample of hair from a clean person and used magic tricks (sleight of hand) to substitute it for his own hair while the sample was tested. or he could have bribed someone on the inside.
get a second opinion from another testing center
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October 18th, 2009 at 1:20 pm
This guy sounds like a clever addict, which is unfortunate for you. Okay cannibis stays in a persons system 30 days and can’t be detected past 30 days. Also in High Times magazine, they show products to flush out the various drugs and the counter product can be ordered through those magazines. He can also get information off the internet from addict science freaks.. As for Subutex, all he had to do was mention that it would be found in his system and have a doctor back his report of subutex as his treatment for narcotics, since Subutex is in itself an opiate derivative it will show but the experts will discount the opiate detection because he is being treated with it and unless one asks for drug speicific testing, he can do any opiate under that cover..
So your lawyer needs to ask for a quantitative (which could prove abuse of his treatment drug Subutex) and a specific drug testing including other narcotics such as you said he uses.
Results take longer and the test may be more expensive. Another thing you may want to do is go to an addictionologist who is someone who is usually a doctor who specializes in drug abuse. Tell him your situation and ask him if he or she can give you information on it. Then later if needed subpoena him to testify in court. Don’t say that is your long range plan. Chemical Dependency people are not thrilled to testify.
You did the right thing and life can get better for you.
Go to the police with the fact he is threatening you. If possible record his off shoot threats and ask "What do you mean by that?" Hopefully he will say kill you or something specific. But even if he doesn’t the detectives will recognize he is threatening you even if it isn’t strong enough for conviction, it is strong enough for an empathetic cop to take a special interest in your case.Addict is viloating the protection order by contacting you. He can be picked up for it. Your daughter needs to get proactive with you and file her own complaints and protection order. Try to speak with a detective and not just a uniform cop.
My prayers are with you. E MAIL me. I care and I will be a part of your support team if you wish. I mean I am available to talk with you. I don’t know where you live. I am in WA state.
References :
I have been threatened and have lived in danger. I am a Chemical Dependency Professional and a Counselor and worked for 20 years,now retired . You need to keep active on this. And if you can ASAP get a therapist for yourself, join a self help group too. You need supportive people around you and people you can depend on helping in an emergency or a time of urgency.
October 18th, 2009 at 2:02 pm
Unless your taking a miltary UA (where they watch you pee) Its not hard to pass a drug test, quick fix is sold at head shops and smoke shops everywhere.(http://www.quickfixurine.com/). As for the hair folicles, I’ve heard of people using some shampoo that works for a few hours. I was one of your kids age in a very similar relationship growing up. Whatever it takes, avoid exposing them to any more of that behaviour, it’s not good…My mom ended up moving me and my infant sister across the country and no names listed in any public file…
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October 18th, 2009 at 2:15 pm
BEST ANSWER>>>LISTEN TO MICHELANN62!!!!!!!!!! There is no better advice, no more accurate information than the words from Michelann. A motivated user/abuser will always find a way to beat the system and will "benevolently" share these findings with every other loser, oops!, I mean user, who wants the info. You write as if you are a very intelligent woman. Please believe me that your biggest problem is not proving your husband’s affinity for drugs; it is his addiction to control and the lengths he will go to in order to maintain it.
Document everything; gather witnesses. If you can afford a good attorney, get one, Whether you can afford an attorney or not, you must do your best to relay events accurately and succinctly- to someone with authority. Your life could depend on your persuasive testimony and your ability to convince law enforcement and/or the courts that your family is in serious danger. Don’t be silent. Protect yourself and your children, lest you become yet another tragic murder/suicide news story.
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I was also married to an addict. He taught me how to pass a drug test back when I was using with him. I have personally known 2 woman who are now dead because they tried to stick by a man who was a domestic abuser.
October 18th, 2009 at 2:49 pm
I come from a pain-med addit family.
Both my sister and brother inlaw are addicted to Methadone and Percoset.
He probably either tampered with his urin (digesting addatives like bleach niacine… ect or the test a defective.
Email me and i will give you my insights on whatever you need help with.
Im sorry i know what kind of a stuggle you are going through, ive had some terrible experiances with my drug abusing family and i will do anything to help others with this problem.
Thankss And god bless!!
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15 yr old brain